2024 was a rough year for me. A lot happened—things with myself, my family, people around me. I don't even know where to start.
The heaviest thing: I lost the person I loved most in this world, the one who understood me best. After that, there's just an empty space inside. Nowhere to pour out the hardships of life. I still can't accept it. It's like I was suddenly forced to grow up. No one says "my Min, you're strong" anymore. She hasn't come to my dreams in a long time. I miss her more than I can say.
I'm not really looking forward to New Year this time. It'll be the first one without her. Our family used to go back home every single year without fail. Now it feels like we have a home but nowhere to return to. Grandma's house was torn down a hundred days after she passed. I actually resent that decision, but the family kept saying the feng shui was bad in many ways, that there was no choice. I don't know if she would feel cold-hearted about it. The home she built with her own hands, the home I looked forward to going back to for New Year—it's gone.
This year was also pretty dramatic. I left my previous company in May and joined the current one. Then in August, the new company fired me. In September, they hired me back. Pretty magical, honestly. I don't even know what to say. The overall environment is really bad.
Another thing: a friend I had a falling out with—we made up this year. But I can't treat her the way I used to. It's a thorn, one that won't go away. We're back to talking about everything, but clearly our values have diverged. Because of our other friends, we both know it but neither of us points it out. Maybe that's what they mean by friends being for a season.
Over New Year's, we put together a group of ten—my childhood friends. It was the first time all of us were together for New Year's with partners. It was boring, but it was also the first time we'd done it that way, so it felt meaningful and happy.
I don't know what next year will be like for me. I just hope it's a bit easier than 2024. This year also brought two new little lives. I hope they stay healthy with us. (By the way, sugar gliders are ridiculously cute!!!! Highly recommend!!! 🤩)
